By Sara Caputo

Photo by David Jay Say "yes" to pampering yourself as well as your bridesmaids

Congratulations, you're engaged! Now what?

Better get ready to answer the inevitable, "What's the date? When's the event?" questions you'll be asked repeatedly for the months leading up to your big day. And better get ready to plan.

If you find yourself breaking into a cold sweat at the thought of planning your own wedding, take a deep breath. As a recently married 30-something who was in your shoes just one year ago, I can help.

Having been a bridesmaid seven (count those dresses in the closet-SEVEN) times, I was looking forward to planning my own wedding. After getting engaged, I had a full 10 months to work on all the details. "No problem," I thought. After all, I'm a professional organizer. I help all types of people organize their businesses, homes and lives. How could organizing my wedding be that much different? Oh yes, I had big plans of taking it on all by myself. Then, after the excitement of the engagement and the shiny new piece of hardware on my hand wore off a bit, I realized: what am I ... crazy?

The following suggestions are helpful tips that I learned through the process of planning my own wedding that may be helpful to you.

1. Get a 3-ring binder.
Even if you plan on hiring a wedding coordinator for your day, you will still be making important decisions, signing forms and looking up information for how you would like your event to go. A 3-ring binder is the perfect organizational tool to keep all of your notes, papers and clippings together in one central place. Use dividers to separate categories to make it easier to leaf through and find what you need.

2. Know when to say yes and when to say no.
There are things a bride should be doing in the days leading up to her wedding and things she shouldn't. Getting a massage and pampering herself? "Should." Schlepping food and picking up flowers? "Shouldn't." In most cases, you'll find that the people who love you want to help you in preparing for your big day. Let them!

Using a wedding coordinator for the "day of" was the best decision for me. It gave me the peace of mind to focus on enjoying my wedding day. Directing caterers, musicians and florists on your wedding day definitely falls into the "shouldn't" category.

3. Time Management.
One of my favorite quotes is: "Time flies, it's up to you to be the navigator." That should be your motto from the time you say, "Yes, I will marry you," to the day you say, "I do." Keeping a detailed timeline in the front of your planning binder allows you to always know where you're at in the process so nothing will be missed along the way.

4. Take care of yourself and enjoy the process.
I feel so sad when I hear brides say that their wedding was a disaster because they were completely stressed out that day. Take care of yourself during the entire week leading up to the wedding. Spend some time alone, so the craziness of having family and friends around, phones ringing and last minute decision-making doesn't get to you. Schedule a relaxing massage (or maybe two), a facial, exercise, lots of rest and at least one quiet dinner with your husband-to-be.

By following the above suggestions, you are sure to create a calm environment for yourself as you plan one of the greatest and most important events of your life! I wish you peace, joy and happiness for your days before, during and after your wedding!

Sara Caputo, M.A., is the owner and CEO (Chief Executive Organizer) of Radiant Organizing in Santa Barbara. For more information, call 689-8414 or visit www.radiantorganizing.com.

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